Alex seemed to be a rather quiet young man. Although he was quiet, those who met him liked him. He could keep people out when he wanted to — even those who were closest to him. He could keep at a distance those whom he should've trusted. He sometimes trusted and turned to that which is not trustworthy.

Alex knew that his family loved and supported him. He had a big heart. He was fiercely loyal — almost to a fault. He'd go above and beyond. He was compassionate and sympathetic. When you hurt, he hurt along with you. When you were happy, he was happy too.

He cared not only about two-legged friends, but four-legged ones too. He loved animals, dogs, cats. He was a quick-learning athlete —adept and able to pick up soccer, football, and swimming and thrive in each sport. But I wouldn't peg him as a jock. He enjoyed comics as well. Star Wars. Legos. And video games. But I wouldn't peg him as a geek or nerd. He took to planting and gardening, too. And, of course, with his employment at different restaurants, he knew his way around a kitchen too.

Today is such a strange day. We gather and we're able to share memories that make us smile and laugh. All the while, we weep. It's a day for which we were unprepared. It doesn't seem real. It's like waking up to a nightmare. It's too sudden, too shocking, to shattering, too much. He was too young.

We older folks who have seen enough of this fallen and broken creation and know all too well its pain and heartache offer to trade places.

The devil, the accuser, stabs his accusations into us and twists the knife. We're angry at ourselves. We're angry at Alex. We're angry at the hold the demons, the things, and the evil ones had on him. He wanted to overcome. He took steps to overcome. He was proud of the steps he'd taken and cherished his newfound brothers. He had plans. A cookout. He had the love and support of his family. He tried to pick himself up, but it caught up with him and he was knocked down.

Like every sinner who sins, we turn to the thing that's destroying us. We look to evil for good and evil just wants us dead. It leaves us mad at the devil. At times, we're mad at God. He is God still, right? We're sad with all of it. Everything is changed. We miss Alex. The pain is too great & it will never be gone. How are we supposed to go on? We want him to wake up. To what end? We want to yell at him. We want to hug him and tell him how much we love him. But here we are, Rachels all, weeping for our children, refusing to be comforted for they are no more.

There is no quick answer from heaven why this tragedy has happened. No explanation of God's master plan and how he's working good through this will do. You'll never be able to find God when he is hidden. The devil will just have great opportunity for you to call the only one who is good, bad. We must see God as He has revealed himself to us.

We must see how God has revealed himself to Alex. On today of all days, and during these hours, our Lord Jesus Christ was suspended on the cross. Look how your God has revealed himself to you. Does God love you? Does God love Alex? Did God pay for Alex's every sin? Is God strong to overcome the demons? The devil? Death itself? Yes. As the people wept for their children because they were no more, God told them Keep your voice from weeping. They shall come back from the land of the enemy. The Lord Jesus Christ, who himself wept at the tomb of Lazarus!, told the widow, whose son lay in the coffin: Do not weep. Then he touches death and the dead. Our Lord Jesus Christ knows death. Don't forget where he was at this time on Mount Calvary, pouring out his life blood for us, for Alex.

It seems improper to quote the scriptures here, almost scolding you and saying stop crying. No, no, no. Jesus wept. We Rachels weep when our children are no more. Any false comforts are seen through instantly for the glib unsympathetic bandaids that they are. This is why Christ and Christ alone, who wept at Lazarus' tomb, gets to say with complete understanding, love, and mercy toward you: / am going to wipe away your every tear. I hung on the cross for you, for Alex. I am going to raise Him at the Last.

Death isn't the last word. Jesus is risen. And this isn't something that's general gospel but not specifically applicable to Alex. When we doubt God's love, we must think upon the cross. When we wonder about God's love for Alex, we must remember how God revealed himself to Alex. God baptized Alex. This is no consolation prize, but this is everything. God has made Alex his very own redeemed child. God has joined Alex to Christ's death and resurrection. Alex heard of Christ at church and in his schooling. Just last week, Alex visited his grandfather at the Haven. They visited in the chapel there.

And Alex stood before the crucifix, a display of God sacrificing his only Son for us, a display of Good Friday. Alex stood there and prayed. He prayed the Lord's Prayer the night before he died. Despite whatever hold the devil and the demons thought they had on Alex, there is one who has a greater hold. There is Christ the Good Shepherd and no no one is able to snatch the sheep out of his hand.

There will be a day when the weeping ends. It's not right now. But soon. The Lord Jesus Christ who died on the cross, showed His power over death and his victory over it by rising from the dead on Easter morn. We may refuse to be comforted for all our days here below. But we who believe in Christ will know a yet more glorious day. The day when the fallen world gives way to the new creation; when the nightmare ends and gives way to sights and joys better than you could ever dream; when the tears will be wiped away, the pain will be gone, when death will die, and we will live together in peace forevermore. This is all what awaits those who believe in the Father, Son and Holy Spirit

— who believe in Christ Jesus the Crucified and Risen Lord.

We want Alex to wake up. In Christ, He will.